First, I have not seen Haywire, so I do not know how good Gina Carano translates to the big screen, but people seem to like her. Secondly, I think it’s ridiculous, but someone ordered an action script from the writers of Dumb & Dumber. Third off, John Stockwell, the director of this movie, just loves tropical vacation environments. Put these three together, and you have the next action movie starring the next big thing Gina Carano – likely in a bikini.
Filmdrunk reported a story saying that Gina, Ms. Carano if you’re nasty, has signed on to the John Stockwell helmed flick – responsible for such gems as Turistas, Blue Crush, and….what the hell, Into the Blue? Notice a pattern here? – where the comedy team of Bennett Yellin and James Robert Johnson decided to wonder if we made Liam Neeson a kick-ass hot girl in her 20s and place her on a beach and get her husband kidnapped, would people watch this movie?
Yeah, again, I cannot judge because I do not know how charismatic Gina Carano is on screen, but since people are saying it’s basically Taken on a beach (hence my awesomely creative title…) I’m apprehensive. With Taken, Qui-Gon owns that movie because he owns that screen. Like, I will wreck your shit and make you watch me wreck everyone’s shit because you kidnapped the wrong damn daughter. Whether she can capture that, we will see.
And the real movie is titled In the Blood. But I still prefer my title. Or Taken 2: Electric Boogaloo. Whatever, just cue the obligatory Into the Blue Jessica Alba bikini pictures. I have to make a living on stats for the site, and having a Jessica Alba bikini tag just works me on a selfish level. You’re welcome.