Back in 2010, Bruce Campbell suggested the idea that he was putting together a horror movie in the vein of The Expendables. Grizzly Bomb has decided to take a stab (sorry) at filling in that hypothetical movie’s dream cast.
During the promotional tour of My Name is Bruce, Campbell entertained the idea of calling a sequel to the film Bruce vs. Frankenstein and populating it with a maelstrom of horror stars.
Yeah, “The Expendables,” or more like the It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World of horror. I want to get so many horror movie stars that people can’t possibly not see the movie. I want to give them other stuff to do… I want Robert Englund to be a tough guy… I want to find out the hidden sides of all these people. Some will play themselves, some will play alternate characters as well. I may approach Kane Hodder to play Frankenstein. He could be Kane Hodder himself fighting himself as Frankenstein. It could be crazy… There’s a script, it just kind of blows right now, so no one’s really seeing it. We gotta work on it. Definitely shoot in Oregon all on a stage. It’s like the “300″ of horror comedies. We want to make it a whole world. Someone’s gotta take Frank down for good.
Although “the Chin” was pretty forthright about the script needing work, not to mention the fact that we have heard little else of this production for the last four years, We here at Grizzly Bomb thought we’d stretch our legs a little and present a dream-cast of this Expendables of horror. Robert Englund and Kade Hodder were already discussed by Bruce Campbell himself, and Tom Savini and Danielle Harris that would seem fairly obvious choices, so we’ll round out the rest of this hypothetical Smörgåsbord of horror players with some other suggestions.
Check out our list below:
Jeffrey Combs
The iconic Herbert West would not have been possible without Jeffrey Combs. The embodiment of H.P. Lovecraft in the ’80s, Combs would be a quintessential addition to Campbell’s film. Filling the void of a nosy, yet cocky performance. Always ready with a syringe and a piece of paranormal advice. Re-Animator and From Beyond are two of the best schlock n’ chock horror films from the decade. If Campbell intended on bringing Frankenstein’s monster into the mix, no one would have been better suited than Combs to drive the Creature’s mind.
Resume: Re-Animator (+3 Sequels), From Beyond, Necronomicon: Book of Dead, The Frighteners. I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, House on Haunted Hill, FearDotCom, Night of the Living Dead 3D: Re-Animation, Femme Fatales, Masters of Horror: The Black Cat, Nevermore.
Asia Argento
Daughter of Giallo master Dario Argento, Asia is horror royalty personified. Beautiful and dangerous, she knows her way around the gore and would bring some much-needed strong female empowerment to the film. Everything from working with George A. Romero on Land Of The Dead to starring in several of her father’s own Italian films, Argento would also lend a sense of edge to the film. She’s uncontrollable in many of her performances, yet knows how to up the suspense with a classic “Scream Queen” shriek.
Resume: Demons 2, The Church, Trauma, The Stendhal Syndrome, The Phantom of the Opera, The Keeper, Love Bites, Land of the Dead, Dracula 3D.
Angus Scrimm
The Tall Man himself, Angus Scrimm is the iconic villain of Don Coscarelli’s Phantasm series. Looking like a living corpse, Scrimm’s presence alone could warrant anywhere from a cameo to ultimately being the outright villain of the whole movie. Given his age (hell, given the age of several on this list), he may not be up for a a lot of physical action, but Scrimm could hold it down with a line-reading and a pair of lifts.
Resume: Sweet Kill, Scream Bloody Murder, Phantasm (+4 Sequels), Witches’ Brew, Chopping Mall, Transylvania Twist, Subspecies, Wishmaster, Masters of Horror, I Sell the Dead, Satan Hates You, Femme Fatles, John Dies at the End.
Katharine Isabelle
Probably the youngest person on the list, but by no means does that make her inexperienced. Isabelle shot up on every horror lovers’ roster with her role in Ginger Snaps and she has dabbled in the genre on and off ever since. Most recently appearing as Mason Verger’s sister on the Hannibal TV series. Many people might also know her from American Mary, an incredibly effective horror film from a couple of years ago that focused on a female perspective, less about eroticism and sexualization than many horror films are. Isabelle would be right at home with these older icons of horror.
Resume: Goosebumps (TV), The X-Files (TV), Disturbing Behavior, Ginger Snaps (+2 Sequels), Bones (2001), The Outer Limits (TV), Carrie (TV), Freddy vs. Jason, Supernatural (TV), 30 Days of Night: Dark Days, Vampire, American Mary, Being Human (TV), Hannibal (TV), See No Evil 2.
Doug Bradley
Ol’ Pinhead himself. Bradley has played the Hellraiser character for almost thirty years and a return to the genre in a movie of a lighter nature is something that may appeal to fans. If you ever get to a chance to hear him speak in interviews, Bradley is a true English gentlemen. He just so happens to also be the bringer of Pain and Pleasure. In Campbell’s film it might be fun to see Bradley have some fun with his alternate film persona.
Resume: Hellraiser (+8 Sequels), Nightbreed, Proteus, The Prophecy: Uprising, Pumpkinhead: Ashes to Ashes, A Vampire’s Tale, Exorcismus, The Reverend, The Inflicted, Lucifer’s Unholy Desire, Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines, Scream Park.
Tim Curry
Tim Curry can simply read the phone book and it would fluctuate between hilarious and the creepiest thing you’ve ever seen. Pennywise the Clown. Yes, IT himself (or itself) should be included in this horror film roster. Amounting to no more than a cameo would suffice from someone like Curry. The ruling is probably out that he would jump back into the white face-paint and clown costume once more but one can dream. No. Curry would bring that perfect amount of silliness to the proceedings.
Resume: The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Legend, Stephen King’s It, Tales from the Crypt (TV), Congo, Addams Family Reunion, Scary Movie 2, Gingerclown.
Christopher Lee
This man has done it all. The list of his accomplishments could fill an article all on its own. Christopher Lee is truly an icon of not only horror but of film. Not usually one to shy away from the schlock, it wouldn’t seem impossible that Lee would agree to appear in Campbell’s Expendables-esque horror film. Though many of his performances as of late have been delegated to cameos, that’s all that would be required of Lee to lend an air of old-school horror legacy to Campbell’s film.
Resume: The Curse of Frankenstein, Horror of Dracula (+6 Sequels), Corridors of Blood, The Hound of the Baskervilles, The Mummy, The City of the Dead, The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll, Scream of Fear, The Devil’s Agent, The Alfred Hitchcock Hour, I Monster, Gremlins 2: The New Batch, Sleepy Hollow, Corpse Bride, Dark Shadows.
Tony Todd
Todd, Hodder, and Englund all appeared together in Adam Green’s Hatchet, so this list appears to be a reunion of sorts for many of these actors. Todd’s commanding voice and distinguished presence made him the perfect choice to play the sadly villainous role in Candyman. So many of the actors on this list could deliver expertly chilling exposition but none seem more adept at it than Todd.
Resume: Werewolf (TV), Night of the Living Dead (1990), Candyman (+2 Sequels), The Crow, The X-Files (TV), Wishmaster, Final Destination (+3 Sequels), Scarecrow Slayer, Hatchet (+Sequel), Splatter (TV), Jack the Reaper, Holliston (TV), Army of the Damned.
Brad Dourif
Lastly, Brad Dourif. A career spanning as far back as 1975’s One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, Brad Dourif is most famous to horror fans as the voice of Chucky and his living alter-ego Charles Lee Ray. Dourif also recently played Sheriff Bracket in Rob Zombie’s Halloween remakes which puts him in fine company among many other horror film icons. Plus, have you seen The Exorcist III? None of the original’s sequels ever held up but the third outing (directed by the author of The Exorcist William Peter Blatty) was an interesting effort with Dourif in a creepy serial killer role.
Resume: Desire the Vampire, Child’s Play (+5 Sequels), The Exorcist III, Graveyard Shift, Critters 4, Trauma, Tales from the Crypt (TV), The X-Files (TV), Nightwatch, Alien: Resurrection, Urban Legend, The Prophecy 3: The Ascent, Pulse, Halloween (2007 + 2009 Sequel), Priest, Fringe (TV), Gingerclown.
Jamie Lee Curtis
We could only wish. Curtis became the Alpha and Omega of the scream queens with her debut role in John Carpenter’s seminal masterpiece Halloween back in 1978. She continued her rise with other horror gems like Prom Night, The Fog, and a personal favorite, Terror Train (David Copperfield plays…you guessed it. A magician, and its ridiculous). Jamie Lee is probably a little over the whole genre, though we put her on this list out of honor and a deep hope that if this film were ever to take off Campbell would have the clout to cast her, even in a cameo.
Resume: Halloween (1978 +4 Sequels), The Fog (1980), Prom Night (1980), Terror Train, Road Games, Virus.
At any rate, we’re going to be waiting a long time for a film even resembling Campbell’s original idea to hit the (small) screen but if ‘The Chin’ can assemble any combination of the above mentioned-legends we could have a cooky and nostalgic-filled fear-fest worth the wait. Here’s hoping Campbell doesn’t give up on the idea anytime soon.
Image: Evil Dead 2 (top photo) – Paramount Pictures, Anchor Bay
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